We went down to Busan on Sunday for another wedding. This one was UnZung’s son. UnZung is MyeongHee’s  good friend who nearly everyday comes to the hairshop to chat and share food. I had never met her son, who bears a strong resemblance to Shrek. He and his bride were pleasant enough and the wedding hall was nice.  But the ceremony itself was very disappointing.

This was the fourth wedding I’ve been to here in Korea. Most of them are similar. It was held in a wedding hall (churches don’t seem to be open for this type of business.) A wedding hall is a business just for weddings – anywhere from a half-dozen to a dozen or so large rooms set up for weddings, complete with flowers, be-ribboned and bowed chairs and a staff, including the officiator/priest/parson/judge or whatever his title is,  to help move them along smoothly. These people are important because they have a virtual parade of weddings on a weekend day, one after the other.  Hurry up, hustle people in, hold the service, hustle them out and move in the next wedding party. There are never enough chairs for all the guests but still many remain empty as many prefer to stand in the back of the hall and chat loudly. No one bothers to talk in hushed voices or quiet their children. Consequently, the ceremony and guests each contribute their share to a cacophony of noise.

So far, today’s wedding was the same as above and all the others with a few exceptions. Apparently, Shrek and his bride had big plans for their wedding album and it included DVD sales. Throughout the “service” cameramen swarmed around the couple and the judge (he really didn’t look like a priest) taking video and still pictures. They would lean in and snap photos of the couple, the flash momentarily blinding the guests in the front. Other would walk up and down the aisles filming guests.  Twice a make-up woman inserted herself between the bride and groom to dab sweat from his forehead and tears (of joy?) from her cheeks.  With all that commotion it was no wonder children decided there was nothing sacred to disturb and ran up and down the center aisle. In between bits of the ceremony, the emcee (yes, there is one) would inform the guests of the next phase – bowing to the parents, cutting of the cake, etc.  Interestingly enough, there is no putting on of rings or of kissing the bride.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a wedding look less like a wedding and more like a movie production. The only thing missing was a clapboard with the scene number chalked on it and a director yelling “quiet on the set!” To have the photographers inserting themselves so incongruously into the ceremony just made me cringe. There didn’t seem to be any respect for the solemnity of the ceremony performed. It’s all just something to get through for the guests until they can quickly leave and go for the buffet.  And leave they do. Once Mr and Mrs Shrek came down the aisle and a few streamers popped that signalled the stampede for food. I used to think it was rude and inconsiderate to make so much noise during the ceremony. Now, no matter how differently Koreans behave  I just consider it “Korea Style.”  If you think I was the only feeling this way, you’d be surprised. MyeongHee also thought all the background noise was rude and the cameras intrusive. Most of her friends think so, too. But, it’s “Korea style,” and tolerated or accepted as such.

I suppose it was still better than our wedding, which by the way is the only “official” part of anyone’s wedding in Korea – the paperwork. All the other ceremonies are just that. They are superfluous and have no official bearing on the status of the couple.